These scents are subtle and lovely without being too floral and appeal to both sexes. The candles come in a classy glass jar with stylish lid, you can have this right on your bedside table without a second thought to what it is. These candles are available now and can be shipped to you in time for the holidays either by placing an order online at www.SignatureSensuality.com, by email lwolf@signaturesensuality.com or calling me directly at 303-912-1994. Look forward to helping you find that perfect gift – whatever it may be!

cheers!

Lauren

The post Valentine’s Day around the corner! appeared first on Signature Sensuality.

Read original article here:

http://www.boulderweekly.com/article-6558-boundaries-for-better-sex.html

Dear Dr. Jenni, 

I read your column last week about the woman who wasn’t so into sex. I’m in a similar predicament. My husband and I have sex about twice a month. Sometimes I really enjoy it, and sometimes I feel like I’m just doing it because I know he needs it. The problem is that if I agree to more sex, he’ll just keep wanting more. It’s like he’s a bottomless pit. I’ve come to a point where I can’t even enjoy any intimate encounters because he’ll just want more sex. Is there a way to feel better or put a boundary on how much sex we have?

—Bounded by Sex

Dear Bounded, 

The good news is that sexual intimacy is still a place that occasionally feels good for you.

The challenge is to have every sexual encounter be a time where you consent not out of obligation, but out of an interest and aspiration for pleasure and connection. You are correct that one approach is to set boundaries that work for you. Having boundaries prevents you from feeling like you are being sucked down the drain of a bottomless pit. It also allows you more freedom to explore and expand to the edges of your boundaries.

I suggest discussing with your husband ways to create boundaries.

Perhaps you agree to three nights a month of sexual intimacy. One night can be all about giving you pleasure. Another night can be all about giving him pleasure. And the third can be a session of mutual giving. The schedule is less spontaneous, but it eliminates blind expectations and therefore anxiety. You know what you are getting into for each date, and you can prepare accordingly by doing things to relax yourself ahead of time. Furthermore, the boundaries allow you to feel free and open to cuddle and touch without repercussions or worry that it has to lead to sex. This may help increase your general intimacy with one another, leading to a higher desire to be with him sexually.

Dear Dr. Jenni, 

My husband seems to have lost all sexual interest in me. He says it is because I have not lost the weight from when I had our son five years ago (about 75 pounds). I was heavy when we met, and he was attracted to me then. I would be motivated to lose weight if I knew it would change his libido and attitude towards me, but I don’t believe him. He says my weight is distasteful not because I’m heavy, but because he thinks it reflects a poor attitude of not wishing to take care of my health.

—Unmotivated to Lose Weight

Dear Unmotivated, 

Your language about motivation is interesting. I’m curious how you feel in your body as a woman? Do you enjoy your current weight and feel sensual and voluptuous? Or do you agree with your husband that weight loss will help your health?

In any relationship we make some decisions that are best for ourselves, and some that are best for the relationship. It sounds like your husband gets turned on when you are feeling strong and confident in yourself — when you have a good attitude, irrelevant of weight.

Since you are both stuck right now in a seemingly sexless marriage, I encourage you to do something different to get unstuck. I’m not saying you need to lose weight necessarily. I’m encouraging you to assume an attitude that screams, “I feel good about myself and my body.” When you are exhibiting a new outlook, your husband’s approach to you might change as well.

Send questions for Jenni Skyler, Ph.D., to drjenni@theintimacyinstitute.org. Skyler is a sex therapist and board-certified sexologist who runs The Intimacy Institute in Boulder, www.theintimacyinstitute.org.

Respond: letters@boulderweekly.com

Questions Send questions for Jenni Skyler to drjenni@ theintimacyinstitute.org.

The post Boundaries for better sex by Dr. Jenni Skyler appeared first on Signature Sensuality.

Little technical difficulty viewing the online store. Here is my current catalogue please view it and direct any questions or order to my email address.

Thank you!

Lauren

lwolf@signaturesensuality.com

or

call 303 912 1994

The post 2011 Catalogue! view here: appeared first on Signature Sensuality.

Among the interesting tidbits:

Contrary to what is conveyed by the media, romance novels and our current medical texts, Basson’s research suggests that it is normal for some women not to experience desire at the outset of a romp. In other words, if you are someone who would choose Sudoku over lovemaking but actually enjoys sex once your partner gets you going, then you are not disordered. Accepting that, Basson has found, leads many women to report much higher satisfaction with their sex lives.

And this:

I am not sure if I am any closer to developing a tidy algorithm for boosting women’s sexual health. But I am more at peace with the idea that, like many aspects of our health, it is an intricate affair.

I agree: sex, sexuality, and sensuality are tricky and complicated. But that doesn’t mean we should ignore them.

Sometimes it’s worthwhile to be mindful of our own experience of sex, and to not beat ourselves up for not having sex like they do in the movies.

And sometimes… the promise of playing with a toy is just enough to make that romp sound like more fun.

What do you think?

The post The Desire to Romp appeared first on Signature Sensuality.

What to do when you and your partner aren’t both feeling sexy at the same time?

Check out her piece here.  And I’d love to hear: how do you negotiate the fluctuations of sexual desire with your partner?

The post Fun Reads: Sexual desire & simple math appeared first on Signature Sensuality.